


Sorrows are dying, Hope was crying

by Amelora



Series: Bartender and his Customer [4]
Category: Elite (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Different First Meeting, Boys In Love, Cancer, Drama & Romance, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, M/M, Mother-Son Relationship, Omander - Freeform, Sick Character, they are not students
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-03
Updated: 2021-02-03
Packaged: 2021-03-17 18:01:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,927
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29104470
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amelora/pseuds/Amelora
Summary: Omar had serious hesitations, dilemmas, and thoughts that troubled him. If he was honest with himself, if he was selfish, he knew... the reason of everything that he felt; the man he fell in love with.Why did he reciprocate his love?----THIS IS PART OF A SERIES.----First Part:Tears are dying, Heart was cryingSecond Part:Sounds are dying, Heartbeat was cryingThird Part:Breaths are dying, Lung was cryingLast Part: Sorrows are dying, Hope was crying
Relationships: Ander Muñoz & Omar Shana, Ander Muñoz/Omar Shana
Series: Bartender and his Customer [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2117583
Comments: 4
Kudos: 24





	Sorrows are dying, Hope was crying

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoy this last part!

"Good then." Ander hesitated. He wanted the words to come out of his mouth not to be wrong, so he thought hard. "Because I am falling in love with this new life."

Omar felt unable to manage the emotions in him. He had learned a few hours earlier that this man lying recklessly beside him was a man who could die. He had heard this man, who was smiling next to him, confessed love a few seconds ago. He felt unable to manage the chaos of emotions within him. Most of all, he was worried that he could not direct the expression on his face. He was sure he was crying, but he did not want to be weak in front of him. He thought he had no right to be weak, in front of him. Also he was sure he was laughing, he shouldn't have stood like that next to a person whose life was devastated a few hours ago. He shouldn't have laughed. He shouldn't have cried. He didn't know what to do. He didn't know what to feel.

Ander seemed to see some of Omar's ambivalence. Even though he thought he would laugh more easily after telling Omar that he loved him, everything turned around. There seemed to be more intense pain in his face. This destroyed the smile on Ander's face too.

"What's wrong, Omar? I don't think I said anything bad."

Omar chuckled helplessly. He felt Ander's hands rest on his face. However, a few seconds ago he could feel his gentle touch, that beautiful hand moving across his skin. But there was something else that caught his attention at that moment. The weird rush that covered Ander's face. He wanted to see that strange expression of rush closer. He moved a little in bed. He moved towards his face. He could still feel Ander's motionless hand on his cheek.

Omar had a very serious expression on his face. This made Ander swallow involuntarily. Omar looked at his throatboll that moved with swallowing. And then to his snapping eyes. Omar felt the weird environment as Ander's hand began to move on his cheek again.

"You want to do it, right?"

This question turned into a loud echo in Omar's ears. When his eyes widened, he finally understood where those touches and that weird environment were going. Although he cannot more fully realize that he was standing on the hill of Ander and observing him like a hungry animal; It was clear that he was accepting something from the closing in his eyes, the fact that he had his other hand not stretched over Omar's cheek, just lying on the bed. It was obvious that he accepted something from lying under Omar that way.

Yet Omar could not accept it. He could not accept it that moment.

"No." he muttered when he swallowed his desires. Ander's eyes were opened, and a meaningless expression began to appear on his face. "I..."

"Omar…" Ander grabbed his face with both hands. He felt the pleasant feeling in his heart from that strange impulse inside him. Moreover, it was just a feeling she felt by touching her face, looking at her. He wanted to know what would happen, what he would feel if Omar touched him.

When there was no movement from him, and did not know what to say, he closed the short distance between them. He brought his head, lying on the bed, closer to Omar's face, looking at his own lips. He quickly caught on Omar's lips. He didn't know how long he was going to keep his head in this way, so he could only keep up with this kiss for a few seconds. He started it himself and ended it himself. In fact, he wanted to stay there even more, put his tongue in his mouth. But he had to drop his neck back immediately.

Still, he spoke without revealing this to Omar, looking eagerly at his face. His hands were still gripping his face. What a beautiful sight to see him on.

"Let's do it." He took a deep breath. "Right now..."

Omar withdrew himself completely. He took Ander's hands away from his face. He moved to the side of the bed where he just lay. Ander could not see his face clearly because his back was turned. Omar could not see the disappointment in Ander's face, either.

"I think it's too early." he said skeptically. He was the person who knew best that it wasn't. He had never told any of the men he had slept with before 'it is too early'. But he didn't remember having ever thought of a serious relationship before.

"Is it early?" Ander got up from where he was lying, taking power from the elbow of his arm. "How long do you want to wait? I told you I am in love with you?"

When Ander spoke in anger, he heard how comfortable his feelings were coming out of his mouth. 

Although he spoke in a slightly pleading voice, he was angry, thinking he was not wanted. Although this was just a sudden thought, it was enough to hurt him. It felt so bad not to be wanted by him. But then there was another thought that came into his mind, that Omar didn't know how to have sex with this thin body. Or maybe he wasn't as enthusiastic as before? Or maybe he had stayed with his all this time because he felt sorry for him? Ander didn't know why he got caught up in these thoughts that could make him depressed.

Omar turned to look at his face. He looked into his eyes, even though he knew he could not convey what was going on. He looked into his eyes, even though he knew that he could not convey all that passion that was in him.

"It was a rough day, Ander." he didn't know what he was trying to say. He just thought it wasn't the right moment. He knew that his body did not have enough strength to adapt to his own. Still, perhaps he was selfish.

"This is nothing but excuse." Ander spoke, expressing anger in his voice, and dropped himself to bed.

He knew when he looked into his eyes that he was wanted - that he was desired - and he could see when he looked clearly into his body. He was sure that the only reason for him to hold back was his illness, he hated it. He hated his sick self.

He lay on the bed with his back to Omar. He was offended when he could not get what he wanted like a little boy.

"Ander please…" this time it was Omar who spoke imploringly.

If he touch him, he could hurt him. Also, he could have hurt him if he don't touch him. He felt he was drowning in this dilemma. He seemed to have nothing left to do except begging him to understand.

He moved towards Ander on the bed. He had to stand on him again, above him, to see his face.

"Please ... You know there's no excuse."

Ander could hear Omar quite well speaking over his shoulder. He could feel his pleas, even his desire. But at that moment he was trying to get what he wanted like a spoiled kid.

"I do not know anything." he reacted sharply.

“Ander…” he muttered. He wanted to touch him, not knowing how to better express his feelings. He put his hand gently on his shoulder. Ander demonstrated that gesture, prompting him to raise his hand over his shoulder. Omar let out a strong breath.

When he realized that he didn't want him to touch him, he leaned over in his ear. He whispered gently.

"I love you." Omar was blowing his breath towards his ear. He didn't realize that he was breathing his warm breath against Ander's ear. "So ... I don't want to hurt you. Understand me ... Please."

Omar waited for a long time, leaning towards his ears. Ander did not respond or react in any way. He only had to turn his head in his direction when he could not feel his breathing in his ear.

He realized he was preparing to stay out of bed. At that moment, the spoiled kid's side was a little cornered.

"Where?"

Omar immediately turned to the voice he heard. Now he could see how anxious he was looking. This man was changing his mind faster than he thought.

"I think I'll sleep on the couch in the aisle."

Ander quickly straightened up. He held out his hand towards him.

"Why?" The hand he extended to him was holding his left arm tightly. "You can sleep here. In fact ... You are already laying here."

Omar used his hand to retract his hand. He looked at his face with a small smile.

“Yes, I lay here but…” he went on, thinking it would purify the unnecessary strained air circulating in the air. "The man I just lay down with has openly offered to have sex together. And sleeping with him makes me a little scared."

Ander tapped lightly on the arm with his hand close.

"You asshole."

Omar chuckled. When he saw Ander turned his back to him again, he approached him slyly.

"I don't know if it's safe for me to sleep next to you."

"That's right, asshole. Go to sleep elsewhere!"

Omar laughed loudly at Ander's face, which was trying to sleep with his eyes closed but strangely shaped with frowning eyebrows. He lay down again beside him, leaving a watery kiss on his right cheek.

"I am not going anywhere." He spoke against Ander's neck. "I'll sleep here."

"Well…" No matter how dissatisfied his voice sounded, there was a part of that cloud of pleasure in his face. "You better not snore."

\---

When Omar opened his eyes, he did not expect to meet Ander's face. He did not expect to wake up facing his face. He could not believe that he was falling asleep in his house, in his bed, next his body. Moreover, he did not even remember properly how he had been through the whole night.

_You want to do it..._

Omar felt a pain down his groin as what Ander said last night echoed in his brain. He had spent all night in the bed of a man - a man he fell in love with. Moreover, he even let him touch him. But all Omar did was turn him down. Because he thought that was what he should have done. The right thing. Or he could have delayed because he was afraid that Ander would not enjoy it. But clearly Ander's passionate gaze denied this idea. Omar was only afraid to hurt him.

"You move too much." Ander spoke in a sleepy voice.

And Omar didn't realize he was spinning around in bed until then. He looked at his furiously furrowed thin eyebrows. Still, the more intense he looked at his face, the more he thought he was beautiful. There might not be any other living creature that could be so beautiful even in sleep. Fine facial details; Red-purple mixed eyelids, long brown-yellow eyelashes, aesthetic eyebrows that he can adore... He lay beside perfect flawlessness, with all his flaws. When he walk away from his own brain, he spoke with a small smile.

"Good Morning."

Ander took his head under his pillow and spoke from there in a hoarse voice.

"It's not good morning for me."

Omar chuckled. He seemed to get used to his sleepy states. Sleepy, grumpy, sullen ... Moreover, he did not know whether this was the case after the illness or before. But he liked it in every way. He approached the pillow where Ander had buried his head and spoke with a laugh.

"If you want, I can awaken you by kissing. That will be a good morning for you."

"I prefer to sleep." Ander moved his head under his pillow. He turned his head somewhere that Omar's voice thought his breath could not bother him. Why could Omar withdraw so easily when Ander was so impressed with him despite the pillow between them? He was still thinking about night.

"Is that so?" Omar stood up again, disbelieving. "You didn't say that last night."

Ander threw the pillow, which he covered his head, towards him. Although Omar noticed this movement at the last minute, he could only turn his head. The pillow was against his neck.

"It was you who rejected me last night!"

Despite Ander's serious appearance, Omar was quite mischievous. With a humorous smile on his face and the pillow in his hand Ander had just thrown, he approached him.

"I don't remember ever refusing to kiss you."

Omar was looking directly at Ander's pink-red thin lips. Then his chin, then his neck, then his throatboll, then the mole over there. But he soon remembered his goal; his lips. Ander's right hand had intercepted when he bent slowly.

"I'm sleepy." Then he was comfortable, as if he hadn't just been examined by Omar's eyes. Or he behaved drowsy. He was just acting rather lethargic and reckless.

First he got his own pillow, which Omar leaned against his chest. Then he placed it under his head. And he turned his back on Omar and decided to go back to sleep.

Although Omar felt uneasy at not being able to kiss him, his sleepy state caused a strange expression of admiration on his face. As he got up slowly out of bed, what he thought was that he could love any of him.

\---

One of the things Omar didn't think about when he stayed there last night was the clothes. He had memorized the location of all Ander's clothes in a few days, and he had seen whatever was in that closet on the day when his stomach was very sick. In fact, when he told Ander that he was surprised that he was so tidy, he even learned that there was someone who came to them for a weekly cleaning. In he was shock at that time, Ander was in his eyes as a very wealthy man.

In fact, thinking about it, Ander was spending every evening at the place where Omar worked, before he became ill, much money Omar could not even dream of.

In Omar's mind, the spoiled figure of the boy, who was indifferent, squandered his money, later the boy who held himself responsible for the breakup of his family had seized the figure. Either way, Omar was sure he loved him. He knew he could fall in love with both of them. But him.

And at that moment, he could walk around that boy's house comfortably wearing that boy's clothes. This was one of her weird fantasies a few months ago. But now it happened.

\---

When Omar went downstairs from the floor where Ander's room was, he could detect the smells coming from the kitchen. He thought the smell of a house with a mother was different. It didn't smell like his home.

"Good morning, Azucena." He had entered the kitchen with a smile on his face and saw that woman startled.

When she left the pan she had kept on the stove and returned to Omar, she greeted him, not showing her little start.

"Good morning. Did you sleep well?"

Omar replied without hesitation.

"Of course." Then he waited a while. He pretended to be looking around. "You have a really comfortable home."

When Azucena turned her attention to the pan again, she continued speaking.

"Is that so? I'm glad you think that."

Omar did not know why there was such a nervous environment between the two when there was a strange silence. Maybe because none of them had a proper speech after the news they received yesterday. Or it could be because of the nervous over Azucena.

"Is Ander still sleeping?" the woman suddenly asked.

While this awakened Omar from his thoughts, he could not remember what he could answer at first. However, he had left Ander asleep a few minutes ago and went downstairs.

"Ah… yes. He's sleeping." He spoke stuttering. Although he just thought Azucena was nervous, he was suddenly nervous too.

He also had a strange feeling in himself that he could not control. He didn't know what its name was, but he couldn't easily make a smile on his face or anything like that.

"Omar." Azucena called out. "What's the matter, sweetheart?"

"I do not understand?" He said as he glanced at him reflecting the question marks in his brain. He didn't know exactly what he was missing.

Azucena took the pan, in which she showed all her interest, from the stove and left it on the kitchen counter. She rushed to Omar's side. And she looked at him thoroughly.

"I just asked a question but you didn't answer." she asked seriously.

This was the first time Omar thought he had seen him. Serious, authoritative.

"Oh, is that so? I'm sorry. What were you saying?" He shrugged quickly. He didn't think he was distracted. Or he didn't think there was a reason to be distracted.

His brain was only focused on her when he probably thought the environment was tense. And he hadn't heard Azucena's question. Yes, it should have been.

"I asked last night if Ander had a problem or not." Azucena was aware that Omar was letting go of his distraction. But for some reason she also didn't want to dwell on it. She thought she knew more or less why.

Omar looked at the woman right in front of him, this time with a more realistic smile on his face. He answered after exhaling a loud breath.

"No. He slept pretty well." Then he continued, thinking that what he said was not enough. "So… I observed he slept pretty well. I didn't ask him about that."

Azucena fixed her eyes on the ground. For some reason, both avoided eye contact. It made the question and answer dialogue between them even more strained.

"Well…" she swallowed. She had to think carefully about what she had to say in order not to burden the young man in front of her. "Did he tell you something?"

_I am falling in love..._

"Something like what?" Omar asked quickly to silence the thought that came to his mind.

"I don't know, something is strange or like that." Azucena spoke with a shrug. She waited a while. She sought a way to express her thoughts more clearly. "Something that can upset you."

_I am falling in love..._ Actually, it was not such a strange thing. It was not something that could upset, break, or hurt him. It was quite a beautiful thing. It's such a beautiful thing, something that Omar just couldn't believe he had. A love. Then why was the same sentence echoing in his brain?

"No." Omar shook his head and muttered. "He doesn't say such a thing."

He saw the gaze of the woman in front of him soften. But he could not read the thoughts in her mind. He didn't even understand the thoughts in his own mind. He didn't understand why everything seemed so complicated to him at that moment. If Ander's mother was not in front of him, he would have had a serious headache at that moment because of his thoughts.

As she sat in a chair at the table behind them, she pointed to the chair next to her. She wanted Omar to sit there.

"I'll go straight to the subject." Azucena said, looking directly into Omar's eyes. As Omar felt the tension had increased, he could see that the woman across from him was behaving more normally. And anymore he felt that the thoughts in his mind were more quiet.

"I'm listening." he murmured. The cold sweat on his hands was more felt at that moment.

"I think you changed Ander." Azucena hesitated. While Omar showed that he was quite surprised by his actions, the woman laughed at his actions. "I'm not saying in a bad way."

"I didn't think so." he said in a low voice, timidly. He wondered how Ander would react if he saw him in this state or heard their speech. He would probably laugh at his timidity.

When Azucena placed a broad smile on her face, she continued to speak. She felt relieved now, after which it was easier to speak.

"I'm sure you actually changed him. He cares more about himself than before... and I think you make him feel better."

She really thought so. She didn't know why she said it at that moment, but she wanted to make Omar comfortable. She wanted to make him feel the value he deserved. The reason why she asked him if Ander was acting strangely was because she saw only that part of her son could hurt people as much as possible. The direction Azucena saw the most was the face that Ander could take in front of the cage where he imprisoned his emotions. She wanted to make sure he wasn't showing the same manners to Omar.

"So ..." Taking advantage of Omar's silence, Azucena started speaking again. "Whatever happens in the end ... Thank you for staying with him."

Omar believed that nothing he did to deserve these words could happen. It was something anyone could do. Moreover, Ander could have cared more about himself because he was sick. But instead of going to his mother the day he found out why he was sick, he went to the bar? He proved himself wrong, Omar.

He wanted to think he was good for Ander. He wanted to think he made him feel better. Yet he did not want to drown in arrogance. Still one side of Omar was saying he wasn't acting enough for him.

If Ander would healed ... Everything could be different. If he thought he didn't really love him, he could have been with someone else. Or he could just stay friends with Omar. He even did not want to mind about that thoughts, although both were possible.

Then what did Azucena mean by whatever happens in the end? Ander's leaving him... Ander's leaving the world ...

Omar clearly could not answer her. When the woman realized the unnecessary harsh air tension on the young man, she touched his shoulder lightly and stood up to set the table. She still had a few things to do. It's like making herself a coffee, and to Omar.

\---

He was able to open his eyes thanks to the wind he felt as the blanket on Ander lifted up. He hadn't seen who did this, but he knew. He also confirmed himself when he heard his voice.

"Come on, wake up. Do you know what time it is?"

He looked around to find where the blanket on the Ander was. Clearly unable to find his cover, he turned in the direction that Omar predicted he was. The blanket was in Omar's hand.

"Give it to me." He stretched his hand towards the blanket in Omar's hand. "I will sleep."

Omar held out the blanket he was holding tightly away from Ander's reach.

"Are you thinking of sleeping all day?"

"Damn, I'll do just that. I'll even sleep for the rest of my life!" Ander said when he came to the sitting position. "Give it to me now!"

Ander had already gotten out of bed without realizing it after a few seconds. While Omar grinned triumphantly, he took the blanket and stepped towards the door.

"I won't." He looked over his shoulder at Ander, whom he was sure was coming after, and continued to speak. "Come get it if you want."

Ander, who followed Omar into the hallway, finally understood his scheme of sorts. As he stood there, Omar quickly descended the ladder, laughing.

"When I get enough energy I'll ask for the price, asshole." Ander said loudly while shouting after Omar.

"I'll wait for that day with pleasure, baby." Omar, already downstairs, responded to Ander.

\---

One more day, Omar was over before he could persuade Ander to go out.

A new movie was added to the movies they finished together at home, and Omar had shown Ander some of his culinary talents. That way he at least kept Ander out of his upstairs bed.

A few hours after Azucena came home in the evening, Omar was preparing to go home. Ander spoke as Omar took his coat from the hanger in front of the exit door of the house.

"You can stay here tonight, you know."

This reserved and inviting demeanor earned Omar's admiration. But he had been saying the same thing for several hours. That he could stay there that night.

“Thank you for your hospitality but…” he continued to speak as he fully donned his coat. "We've talked about that before, right?"

Ander bowed his head. He muttered. Although he did not want to admit it, he did.

"Yeah, we talked."

Omar smiled. This man, who was standing in front of him, bowed, was making him feel strange. It made many different sensations taste at the same time.

"I'll come again tomorrow." He said meekly and softly. Then he continued with her mischievous attitude again. "So don't act like we're saying goodbye."

Ander looked up. He answered with a slight frown.

"I'm not acting like that."

Omar giggled and turned to open the door.

"Well. Whatever you say is so."

Ander took a few steps towards Omar before he left the door. He gently wrapped his arms around his neck. This move made Omar turn to him. It made Omar's face turn to him. He gently made his lips meet his. When Omar felt the softness on his lips, he thought he could spend the whole night there. Again and again. But he soon forgot this thought. Without separating Ander lips from his, Omar had not made an attempt to separate him. He wanted to stay stuck there. But when Ander did this, he took a few steps back to pull himself back. The impasse of thoughts was reflected in the movements he made. The arms around Ander's neck kept the two of them not apart. So Ander rested his forehead on Omar's forehead.

"See you tomorrow." he said.

Omar didn't think he had the will to stay that way with Ander for a few more minutes. That guy turned out to be more daring than he thought.

\---

When Omar went home that night, he thought it was selfish to force Ander to stay in his house for a week. He didn't actually force him, but he still shouldn't have made this offer. He could take care of Ander without making such an offer, he could spend time with him.

Maybe he should have told him that he withdrew this offer. This could have been a bit hurtful. Perhaps he should have told him that he should never have made this offer. That would be more hurtful. Ander might even think he didn't want to take care of him.

But if it is his last times ...

Omar quickly erased this thought from his mind. He should have asked if he wanted to stay with him again. It was the more polite one. Asking again, to be sure.

However, there was a visible joy in Ander that day when Omar made that offer. There was no point in asking again.

Why did he seem so happy?

What could happen if he stayed at his house for a week?

Omar also had a side that said he was not selfish. This side who says that since he fell in love with him, he has made enough sacrifices; they would spend a week with him in a house of their own. This was not even in response to his sacrifices.

_You shit, what sacrifice are you talking about?_

They could stay together as lovers do. Or your spouses.

Well, what was Omar and Ander's relationship now?

###

Ander got up that morning before his mother went to work. The irregular sleep has been one of the most disturbing things to him lately. Sometimes he could not recover during the day, and it destroyed the part of Omar who was keen on doing many activities. He felt self-guilty feelings about this subject.

And when he thought about these, he could ignore the existence of the disease. Sometimes it just felt like he was having disease of sleeping. That one day would surely pass.

But that day ... When he wanted to touch him, wanted to feel him, and didn't get the response he wanted, Omar reminded him that he was struck by the fact that he was a sick man. 

Still, Ander's brain reminded him of his illness in everything that troubled him. In all matters.

And apparently that day was one of those days when Ander's stomach was sensitive.

\---

While Ander was making one of those teas he thought was good for his stomach, he heard the outside door open. It was not something he had encountered that his mother returned for something she had forgotten. But that woman's life was also turned upside down -because of him-.

But when he heard Omar's voice, his thinking completely stopped. Omar had entered with the key.

Omar has the key to his house.

"I came." With the usual vivid expression on his face and a few bags in his hand, he moved towards the kitchen.

Ander did not know exactly how he would react to his arrival. He was delighted - this was his usual cycle - and he surprised - because it was so strange for him to go in with the key. He had many questions in mind. One of them was why he had the key. Or what's in those bags.

"Won't you say 'welcome' or something?" Omar spoke as he put the bags on the kitchen counter. The man in front of him could tell from the expression on the man's face that he was quite surprised.

"Yes, of course." Ander stammered and spoke. "Welcome."

He approached to kiss his cheek. When he left a wet kiss on his cheek, Omar did something Ander had not anticipated. He hugged his waist. He hugged tight enough to hurt him.

Omar backed off when Ander wanted to move his arms around his waist in response. He turned to the bags on the kitchen counter to get his attention or focus elsewhere. He started talking when he started taking out the products he had bought from the bags. But Ander was already starting to think there was something odd about him.

What could be more strange in love with a man who is going to die after all?

"When I went home yesterday, I found a soup recipe online. I want to try it with you. I think you will definitely like it." When Omar removed all the items from the bag, Ander found that most of them were everyday items that could be at home. Moreover, their home could soon return to a grocery store, as his mother recently bought a lot of vegetables and fruits.

"I have no doubt that it will be so, but…" he hesitated. He waited until he saw Omar return to him. "I don't think you need to have these. So-"

"I've never made this soup before. I can do it more than once, so I bought some extra materails." Omar suddenly interrupted Ander and made his explanation. He was not someone who could challenge Omar to speak fast. And if Omar told him, he was doing this because of his obsession with not being a burden to people, the two would have a strange argument. He said his second statement about why he bought so much material.

"I understand." Ander muttered when his gaze bowed.

Omar also loved this side of him, which he adopted very quickly. But sometimes this part could be a nuisance. As long as he just fought against Omar like that, there was no problem. He just had to be like that towards Omar.

Ander suddenly started talking aloud to the other thing that came to his mind.

"Really ..." He tried to look at Omar's hands. He seemed to be looking for something. "You entered the house with the key."

"Ah, yes ..." Omar was interested in the materials, ignoring him. Or he was trying to think of the recipe in his mind. "Your mother gave it yesterday. So that I can come whenever I want."

Ander's eyes widened. He knew the two of them talked too much - they even got along quite well - but he didn't know that his mother had so much confidence in him.

"Wow…" he reacted to his own thoughts.

Omar must have heard this reaction when he turned to Ander with a small giggle. He stopped dealing with the materials in front of him for a short time.

"What happened?"

"My mom may have really accepted you as her son-in-law."

Ander understood what he was saying when Omar started to laugh a little loud. Then he approached his face, left a full kiss on his lips, and drew back.

"Sure, does she have another choice?"

That was the only moment in that day when the two of them laughed together.

\---

Omar was very attentive in making the soup. In fact, he was so attentive that he ignored Ander's existence. Ander, who stood right next to him and did not take his eyes off him. Was it attentive or something else, neither knew. Perhaps Omar's mind knew.

He had told Ander that he could do whatever he wanted before, and that he could go to his room and rest. Ander thought he said this for his sake, but at that moment his mind changed. He thought his presence might disturb him there. Omar looked very tough and serious. Ander did not often see him that way - never. Moreover, he knew that it was against his personality that he looked so strict while making a soup.

He put his hand on his shoulder, thinking that maybe he might distract him a little. Omar did not show any reaction at first. But when Ander's hand suddenly moved to his face -his cheek-, he moved his shoulder.

"What are you doing?" he had asked quite harshly. Like angry.

When Ander suddenly withdrew his hand, he held up both hands. Like a criminal caught by the police.

"Nothing."

Omar didn't know why he responded so harshly to his touch. Or why he's trying to keep a distance from him. But when he suddenly saw his face, he saw himself guilty of his cold behavior.

Still, he just returned to making the soup and smiling at Ander.

"I guess that's how I reacted for being tickled. I'm sorry."

"You didn't react that much. Why do you apologize right away?" Whereas you should have fun with it.

Ander knew that if Omar was in his normal state, he wouldn't quickly see himself guilty for something so simple, he would even be mischievous. What could have happened overnight?

"I apologized for having to apologize." Moreover, he was quite tougher than normal. He was making this situations even worse for Ander.

"You're fine, aren't you?" He suddenly asked. While taking a tough demeanor just like his.

Omar was shocked. His body shook so much that Ander's eyes could saw. It was the first moment that Omar woke up, drowning in his own thoughts. Ever since he entered the house, or even left his own house, his thoughts had completely taken over his mind. Even though he thought he wouldn't reveal this to Ander, he felt like he had undergone a change. In fact, a change big enough to worry him.

"I'm fine, Ander." Omar turned to Ander with a smile on his face. It was one of the signs that he should shut up at that moment.

\---

"Did you decide to grow your beard?" Ander asked as he sat in one of the chairs by the kitchen table.

He had just felt it when his hand touched Omar's cheek, but at that moment, when he looked more carefully at his face, he realized that he was seeing Omar with a stubble beard for the first time.

"No." Omar spoke as he laid the bowl of soup in front of Ander. "Why did you think so?"

Ander pursed his lips. He looked at the soup bowl Omar brought in front of him. Then he started cooling the soup with the spoon he put next to it.

"For the first time, I see beards so prominent on your face, and I thought you decided to grow your beard."

After Ander's words, Omar unintentionally went to his face. It was just like Ander said. Yet Omar was sure he was looking in the mirror that morning. He must have looked. Though he wasn't exactly sure how he got out of his house.

"I did not realize." he murmured. He had a bowl of soup in front of him, just like Ander. He spoke again before dipping his spoon into the bowl. "I was shaving almost every day on my way to work, so it's normal that you've never seen me like this before."

"I understand."

Ander did not drink the soup just like Omar did, and he passed the spoon through the bowl. There was only one difference; Ander was also looking at Omar. Omar was just looking at the bowl in front of him.

Also, the long silence between them was not pleasant. Usually, Omar would talk with his glee or find something to talk to Ander about. When he was silent, there was a real silence between the two.

Ander was sufficiently disturbed by this situation. And if Omar didn't break this silence, Ander would. He eagerly took a few spoons of his soup, to get his attention, then began to speak.

"This is really good." He pointed to the bowl with the spoon in his hand. He put a loving smile on his face and continued to speak. "You're pretty talented at housework."

"When I live alone, I have to do it."

Omar could not clearly perceive the sentence coming out of his mouth. If he was talking to an ordinary person, a colleague, he would not regret saying this. But he was speaking towards Ander. Why did he say it with a face as if he was not satisfied with his own life?

Still facing his bowl, he turned to Ander. The affectionate look on Ander's face had just disappeared. Omar felt a pain in his throat. He swallowed. He thought maybe he could pass that pain so he swallowed.

"I mean ..." Omar started speaking in panic. "I'm not that talented."

Omar did not want to reflect the pessimistic thoughts he had on his face, speech, actions. But inadvertently he was caught in those pessimistic thoughts. He was acting strangely enough to even worry Ander.

"Anyway, I think you are." Ander again put on the affectionate expression he just had on his face. He continued to speak while drinking his soup. "Besides ... it's me who is the incompetent and if we plan to live in the same house in the future, I should learn things like that."

Ander turned his face to Omar again. There was a puzzled, perhaps offended expression. Or a combination of the two. He was looking at Ander. It was obvious from every aspect that he wanted to say something. He opened his mouth. But all he did was keep quiet.

Omar normally should have been delighted when Ander said something like that. Is not it?

\---

Ander had not learned the reason for the strange silence between Omar and him that day. And Omar insisted on leaving, even though his mother had just arrived, still daylight.

Moreover, Omar did not know why he wanted to go. He just needed to give some rest to his thoughts - his brain, his heart. If he stayed there longer, he could show Ander his most pessimistic and emotional state. Perhaps even Azucena could see it. He didn't want that. He would come again tomorrow anyway.

What if not tomorrow for Ander? 

What if he can't see tomorrow?

What could Omar do about that?

The passerby wanted to hit his mind suddenly. But he just frowned and got angry with himself.

Despite the tense atmosphere between them, Ander sent him off with hugged, kissed, just like yesterday. Maybe they could really do this every day. They could live.

What if they can't do the same things again?

What if he doesn't live?

###

Omar woke up on the sixth day of his break off with a headache.

Yesterday evening the amount of alcohol he took was too much to comfort himself, to silence the pessimistic thoughts in his brain. One bottle, by the second bottle, had consumed almost every bottle of alcohol he bought. And maybe this was the first time he broke up his house in a long time.

In the kitchen, many unwashed plates lay on top of each other, containing not only yesterday's but also the day before yesterday.

He hadn't been going to the bedroom for a few days to sleep, he generally preferred to sleep in the bad room at the entrance. Still, many of the clothes in her bedroom closet were scattered on her bed. Some of the dirty laundry is on the floor, some in the laundry hamper.

Omar knew that he had never left his house so untidy. He could not be comfortable in such a disorganized house. But anymore, he had an uncaring - desperate - attitude that scared him.

While he was looking for his phone to check the clock, his hand hit several bottles and they were knocked down. Even though those bottles did not break, the noises they made deepened the pain in his head.

When he finally reached his phone, he looked at the clock. It was almost noon. And that had whipped Omar's feelings of guilt. He was still asleep at the hour he should have been with him already.

He had been a little - quite - strangely strange to Ander than he was normal yesterday, and he might even have put an emotional distance between them. Promising himself that he would fix this today, he got up from the chair he had just laid down to prepare.

\---

When he opened the door, he started to hear the voices coming from inside of house more clearly.

He was sure that one was the female voice - Azucena - and the other was the voice of the man he fell in love with. But he didn't understand why Azucena was still home at this time. Or why their voices were getting so loud. As if they were fighting.

He wonder if that day was the weekend?

He wonder if Azucena had no job that day?

When Omar took a few steps inside, he would understand why.

\---

"For God's sake, Ander! Couldn't you be a little careful?"

Ander heard his mother scolding him as he rubbed his aching ankle. He knew she was right whatever she said. His mother knew that no matter how angry she might be at him, he would not dare to say anything. 

He had stumbled on the stairs several times yesterday. And as he was trying to come down today in his sleepy state, he had been careless enough to injure his ankle on the last steps.

"What is the problem?"

They didn't even realize that Omar was there, or even the door was opened until they heard his voice. Neither Ander nor Azucena.

Ander wanted to stand up to speak as Azucena walked around the kitchen spoken to herself. Although he could not understand why he was trying to stand up - that may have been one of his body's reactions to seeing Omar suddenly there - the pain in his foot made him sit down again.

Omar was already with him, he heard with a little whimper from his mouth.

"What happened to you?"

Omar asked, looking at the bandage on Ander's right ankle. Ander cursed himself for hurting his foot after that weird tension between them yesterday, creating a new problem. It felt as if a new problem had not been solved yet. Moreover, he was the cause of all the problems. And his mother entered the conversation as he gave his own inner struggle and looked away from Omar.

"He fell down the stairs this morning." It was clear from her voice that she was still a little bit angry.

"What?" Omar showed a sudden and loud reaction. Ander couldn't expect anything less from him.

"We just came from the hospital. They just said it was a sprain." Azucena continued to speak. On the one hand, he was trying to make coffee in the kitchen. This was the way he kept his head occupied. "Thank God, he didn't break his foot. Or I don't know how we were going to deal with it."

By the time Ander's mother finished her word, she was already moving in her own world. While Omar just looked at her, he slowly turned his head to Ander. He asked with a deep breath.

"Are you okay?"

Ander answered, trying to smile.

"I'm fine since I didn't break my foot."

Omar did not know what expression he was showing at that moment. But when the smile on Ander's face faded, he realized he was not cheerful.

Moreover, it was obvious that he was very worried. As Omar exhaled, he slowly hit Ander's head in the head. He didn't care that Azucena was watching them from the side.

"You fucking asshole!" he shouted. It was not clear when his tearful voice when he shouted. But when he lowered his voice, set a gentler tone, he spoke again and his tearful voice was clearly heard. "Take care of yourself..."

Omar slowly put his head on Ander's knees. He was sitting in front of his knees at the line of his legs. Ander did not know what to do, opened his arms towards him and cuddled him tightly. He did the only thing he knew he could do. He hugged him and tried to comfort him.

\---

Omar helped Ander's mother make a bed downstairs for Ander. It was best for him not to use the stairs as much as possible.

In his plans, Ander had to leave to stay in Omar's house after tomorrow. But Omar did not express his hesitation on this matter, and Ander's foot was damaged. If he told him that he didn't have to stay in his house, he could have gotten quite wrong. Or maybe this would be the most appropriate. He didn't have to leave the house to rest his foot.

Then he remembered a few things Azucena had told him that the doctor had admonished them firmly. Ander's body remained immobile, and his bones became rather clumsy. Now Omar understood more clearly why he looked like an old man. So he had to go out and wander at least half an hour a day.

Omar didn't know how to ask the question about whether he should stay at his home or not.

\---

When the three of them sat together at the dinner table, Azucena noticed the oddity in Omar. But she just watched him. She didn't say anything.

Ander thought that the strange mood in Omar is getting worse today. His foot sprained in the morning had a great impact on him. He also cursed himself for spraining his foot when he remembered that it was his last day at home tomorrow.

"I'll come to stay with you after tomorrow, right?" Ander spoke eagerly. He asked excitedly, even though an inner voice said it was not time to ask this question. He just wanted to ask. And he didn't know how long he had begun to make his wants so easy.

"What you said?" Omar was absentminded. He was very distracted. He had not even heard of himself being called.

Even Azucena noticed it. It was not like an unnoticeable difference.

Ander became sensitive because he thought he was not listening. This was very easy for him; become sensitive. But he asked, taking care not to change his face. Omar's thoughts seemed to suffocate him enough, and if Ander tended to be nonchalant with him, he might have turned into a worse mood.

"It's a week after tomorrow. I can stay with you... your home now, right?" he asked in a more descriptive way, trying to appear more enthusiastic. He shouldn't have shown that he was getting sensitive.

"Ah, yes. It's going to be a week tomorrow." Omar could only mutter. It was he who was nonchalant.

He had asked him to stay with him. But at that moment he responded in such a way as if he was not enthusiastic about it. Whereas he was simply overwhelmed by his pessimistic thoughts. Whereas he thought he was selfish just by keeping him with him. Whereas it was just… the alcohol he missed yesterday was making his head ache.

But Ander didn't give up. His understanding side was on.

He thought that Omar had not heard the last question — he wanted to think. And so he asked the same question again. He could do this thousands of times a day, as long as he had enough energy.

Omar didn't know when he had become such a stubborn man. He was definitely not like that when he met him, he was giving up quickly.

"I can stay with you, right?" he asked enthusiastically, moreover, with the same enthusiasm and enthusiasm.

Although Azucena did not want to be involved in the conversation, for a moment he saw Omar's eyes drift towards him. She didn't know why she felt that way, but she saw that Omar was looking at her as if he needed her permission again. That's why she felt she had to talk.

She coughed, and when Ander's attention reached her, she began to speak, looking at Omar.

"It's ok for me, you can take him today too."

Ander looked at his mother, trying to make a nervous look. He still remembers their morning arguments.

"You want to get rid of me, right?"

Azucena spoke mischievously without looking at Ander.

"Someone has to take care of you before you break your own head." She turned to Omar. She continued to speak with a smile. "This young man also seems very eager to look at you."

"I see, you want to get rid of me." Ander turned to the dinner plate in front of him and continued to speak.

"Exactly, I want!" Azucena said, keeping her gaze away from Ander.

It was the first time that Omar saw such a mixture of funny and weirdness in front of the two. Their eyes turned to him with a little giggle that escaped his mouth.

He spoke, pressing his lips together and trying to stop him laughing.

"Pardon." 

When Azucena finally looked at Omar, she thought that his old self was sitting there. She watched the young man with joy as a small smile formed on her face.

When Ander saw him laughing, he felt a stone rising from his heart. He felt relief, comfort. He didn't think he needed his laugh so much.

In fact, from the moment he realized that he was in love with him, he knew he needed everything that belongs to _him_.

\---

Ander was sitting in his bed downstairs prepared for him. When Omar walked in with a huge bowl of popcorn, his body moved automatically. Although there was enough space for him in the bed, when he saw him come in room, he thought he needed more space for him.

"What boring movie are we watching today?" Omar asked as he sat on his reserved seat in the bed.

"I don't know, you have the choice today." 

Omar spoke as he grabbed the remote and browsed the movies on TV.

"Then..." He turned his head to Ander, facing the TV. "To the honor of getting rid of the world's most boring movies... We will watch animation."

Ander laughed and tapped Omar on the shoulder close to him.

"Idiot, don't you like my movie taste?"

Omar shrugged, looking at the TV.

"You're the one who sleeps halfway through the movies you choose."

"You idiot!" 

Omar extended his arms to him, laughing.

Ander certainly began to think he was back.

\---

While watching the movie, he was resting his head on his shoulder. This was one of the most comfortable things for him. He could easily fall asleep on his shoulder. And that way, he fell asleep halfway through those movies they watched. But that day did not happen.

Ander was disturbed by the intense smell of perfume on his nose. Although he did not show this at first, he thought that he could not stand it anymore. He spoke as he lifted his head off his shoulder.

"Did you pour the whole perfume bottle on yourself or did you drink the whole perfume bottle?" while he was scratching his nose.

Omar chuckled as he pulled Ander, rising from his shoulder, to approach him again.

"I think I drank the whole bottle of perfume." he said.

When Ander saw her laughing at ease, he couldn't care about other things. He felt the weight of a stone on his heart fly away, still. He left his body completely to him while laughing with him. He knew he could stay there despite the intense perfume smell.

\---

Omar told Ander that he didn't need to get up while he was preparing to go home. After all, he didn't have to walk him to the door every day. He shouldn't have done this, especially when he had such a hard time standing.

Whatever he said, Ander did not listen to his insistence and said he would pass him to the door.

"You are becoming more and more a stubborn man."

Omar said he was trying to put on his coat.

Ander spoke as he took strength from the wall near him.

"Aren't you interested in stubborn men? Or don't you love me anymore?" He asked mischievously.

Omar took a few steps towards Ander when he was fully dressed. As he wrapped her arms around his neck, he approached his lips. He involuntarily closed his eyes as he kissed his slowly. He would not have thought that even a kiss would give him such great pleasure. When he slowly separated his lips from his, he was able to speak.

"No way..."

\---

Omar had to take care of himself after collecting his messy house when he went home later.

Although he still had worries, he couldn't wait to host him at his home.

###

Ander didn't want to spend another day at his house. Or that was rude. He could not wait another day to go to Omar's house. In fact, he would likely do the same in Omar's house as he was doing in his own home. But the thought of spending the night with him was more of his interest. He wanted to be in the same house with him as soon as possible.

Omar had arrived at what time he was coming earlier that day. The strange thing was not the hour he arrived, but that Ander was awake. Ander himself had admitted to the fact that he had been quite lethargic lately.

"Welcome." He greeted Omar in the kitchen.

He stumbled close to him because of his right foot.

"How are you doing?" Ander was already tucked into his arms when Omar asked. If someone asked Ander why he did this, he would say that he easily hugged Omar because it is difficult to stand.

"The only problem with my body looks like my foot."

When Omar put a small back at Ander's answer, Ander hung on his lips. He left a quick and passionate kiss. When he pulled back, he left a short distance between his lips. Omar did not know at that moment if it was time to raise a serious issue, but he spoke out of his mouth.

"The next chemo will be tomorrow." He saw Ander get serious just like himself, and his arms around his neck were stretched. "You're ready, aren't you?"

That question was important to them. It was important to them that Ander was determined to heal. It was important for them or him to fight for himself, for life, for his future.

Ander continued to speak seriously.

"I'm ready. And…" he leaned his forehead against his. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes. "I want to come to your house today ... with you. Do you mind?"

Omar hesitated a little. When he did not answer, Ander's closed eyes opened.

"Do you mind?" He asked again. By looking to his eyes.

When Omar finally realized the question he was asking, he grinned.

"I have to check my agenda."

Ander let his smile spread over his face.

"So I'm coming to your house tonight."

Omar laughed more and insisted on Ander's confident demeanor.

"I said I have to check my agenda."

Ander asked, trying to look angry.

"Did you promise someone other than me?" He pulled back one of his arms, which he wrapped around Omar's neck, and tapped gently on his shoulder.

"I don't know…" Omar pursed his lips, which Ander was getting closer and closer. "I should check it out just in case."

"Silly." Ander spoke before merging with the mouth of the man with whom he was staring at his lips.

\---

Ander had already prepared a bag for his stay with him. His clothes, his medicines; he had bought a few unnecessary pieces of excess and items that almost filled a suitcase. It was his mother who said he had to put some of these. She said she wouldn't do it if Ander told her to bring anything from house. So Ander put everything he didn't want to forget in his bag. Simply everything was in the bag.

Omar could not help but express his surprise when he saw the small bag for Ander.

"I didn't know you moved to me."

He was trying to grab the bag and measure its weight. He was sure it had a human dead inside.

"Because my mother was curious about yesterday to get rid of me, I had to pack my bag, the size of a wardrobe."

While Omar smiled at Ander's grumpy demeanor when talking about his mother, he left the bag at the entrance to remember when they were leaving.

\---

Everything was normal when they went to Omar's house. At first the two couldn't decide what to do, then decided to empty Ander's huge bag.

T-shirts, sweat suits, trousers, underwear... More than any of them. Moreover, creams, napkins and more, which he never thought would be needed. Ander could have collected all his belongings from his home and brought them.

Besides, just for a week ... Maybe they could extend that period a little bit. Maybe ...

They just needed to know what progressive chemotherapy would look like. Or the name of the relationship between them ...

\---

"You can sleep here." Omar was showing Ander the bed in his bedroom. When he moved into this house, the thing he worried about most was the bed. He had wished it was as comfortable as possible. And he was lucky. He had a double bed.

However, he did not think he could use his double bed that night. He didn't think Ander could sleep next to him.

"Where will you sleep?" Ander had asked before he sat down on the bed. Thanks to the ankle, thanks to muscle pain, thanks to lack of energy; he could not survive for a long time.

"On the couch."

Ander's suddenly frowned.

"What do you mean, on the couch?"

Omar didn't know what to answer. He could not say that he would want to touch him if they slept together, or that Ander would not be patient with any of his attempts, and he was afraid of what they would experience as a result. He thought. It must have taken a long time for him to think that Ander exhaled dullly and spoke with his sullen face.

"What exactly are we, Omar?"

"What?" he stated a true expression of surprise.

"What's our relationship?" Ander turned Omar's gaze into his own hands. He couldn't say such things without making direct eye contact with him. He was a shy man. "I was thinking… We're not just friends or flirting anymore. What are we then?"

Ander raised his face. He looked at Omar. He needed to hear or see what he was thinking. But when he realized he was not going to speak, Ander continued to speak again. He did not bow his head. He didn't look the other way. He looked directly, resolutely at Omar.

"Even if we think we are lovers... We cannot even sleep in the same place. How are we lovers?"

Omar knew he was not the one to make this certain. At least he always thought so until that day. If Ander said they were lovers, everything was perfect for Omar. But when he look at the situation from his frame, someone in his position - a sick man - like Ander, no matter how many other people flirt with him; He would like to hear the approval of their relationship from that person. He wanted to know that there was no burden on him. He wanted to know that there was no excess for him. He really wanted to be with him.

Until then, Omar always thought he knew Ander well. But he could not always look at things from his perspective.

After all, Omar could not understand a sick man.

Afterwards, things happened very quickly. Omar rushed past the bedroom door to where Ander was sitting.

Since Ander's gaze did not leave Omar, he was looking at him even as he came running towards him. He was staring at him even though he was standing on him at that moment.

Omar kissed him on the lip, before Ander realized what was happening. He intensified his kiss as he grasped his face with both hands, searching his tongue from his mouth. Only when he heard the sound of Ander's mouth groaning, he could separate his lips from him. Then he realized that he had to speak. He didn't realize that his eyes had been closed until just before. When you see a pair of eager eyes and a blushing face; Moreover, when he realized that this face belonged to Ander, he realized that his eyes and mind had just been closed.

"Can I be your lover?"

Ander thought his lips needed him. He thought he needed his hands to go around his body. He thought he needed to know what his skin felt like. But those words were one of the things he needed most at that moment. The words he heard from Omar.

"Of course." Ander said while he closed his eyes and smiled.

When Omar couldn't stop anymore, he climbed onto Ander's tiny -sick- body. He wanted to drag his hand deep into his body. He slowly moved one of his hands which just holding his face, to his flawless looking neck, his shoulder that presently seemed wider to him, and his torso that was weaker than before. At that moment he felt the body under him tremble. Omar didn't think why he did this, he withdrew himself. He had stopped their breathless kissing.

Although Ander was willing to ask what the problem was, his numb lips and his brain didn't want to ask questions. So it was Omar who asked.

"Are you cold?"

Omar did not know that he was a man who could so easily stop his lust. He didn't know why he thought he was cold either. Only the shaking underneath had bothered him. He didn't even think it might be from pleasure.

Ander grabbed Omar's face with his hands and pulled him to himself.

"No…" he gave his warm breath to his face. "Keep going..."

Even though the two of them let themselves go to their current lust, Omar would apologize to him all night, thinking he hurt him.

\---

"Good Morning."

Omar was looking at Ander, who woke up before him. While they should normally experience the opposite, Ander was the first person to wake up that day. Either the world was turning upside down or everything was just fine. Both were an early thought.

"Good Morning." Omar responded with a hoarse voice. Then, for a short moment, he closed his eyes and felt the cold stuff moving across his face. And when he opened his eyes slowly, he saw Ander's hand, his eyes running over his face.

"Why don't you cut your beard?" Ander asked thoughtfully.

Omar knew they had given a speech like this before.

"I don't know, I didn't care much." He opened his eyes. He looked at him. "Do you want me to cut it?"

Ander smiled. He pulled his hand from Omar's cheek.

"It doesn't matter. It's just…" he bit his lower lip. "You're getting more charismatic that way."

Omar laughed. He straightened up from where he lay and climbed over Ander. He bestowed intense kisses on his lips that would show him that he was hungry, though not as intense as the night before.

###

Ander thought long and hard one day when he and Omar returned home from chemo. Although his body was quite tired and unbearable to move, at least these thoughts did not cause him pain or fatigue.

Moreover, when they were lying side by side at night, he had asked without hesitation.

"When did you fall in love with me?" he had asked in a direct and dull voice. He had completely awakened Omar, who had fallen asleep next to him. He even reacted so suddenly that he almost jumped out of bed.

"Whe- What?" 

Ander asked again, looking seriously at him. In fact, he might have laughed quite a bit at his previous situation, but he didn't. He also wanted to clarify other questions he had in mind. He also added the questions.

"When did you fall in love with me? And…" He hesitated. He pressed his lips together. Although he was hesitant about asking about it or not, he would. "How many people have you had sex with before?"

Omar had a bigger reaction to the last question.

"For fuck's sake, Ander. How many do you think I could had sex with?"

Ander spoke, trying to hide his embarrassed and blushing face with his arms.

"I just wondered..."

"God…" Omar covered his face. He let out a deep breath. And he lay down next to Ander again. "I don't know how many people you think I slept with ..." His voice was quite loud and as if yelling. He then lowered his voice and continued to speak more gently. "... But I didn't sleep with anyone after the day I saw you. I didn't sex with."

Ander asked as his eyes opened in surprise.

"After you saw me?"

Omar turned to him resolutely and continued to speak.

"Yes, I haven't sex with anyone after I saw you." Omar grinned. "You didn't even see me, but ... you seemed to have taken over my mind. So ... I was already under your influence when you met me.

Ander felt these words melt his body. He had previously hinted that Omar loved him when he tried to flirt him many times. Each time he was seized by those words, his body by the warmth of those words. Now he was also under Omar's influence.

“As for the other question-” Omar took a deep breath and turned his face over Ander.

"You don't need to answer."

Ander said when he took his right arm to Omar's chest. "You don't need to answer that question."

###

Ander was sitting in the hospital corridor with his mother on one side and Omar on the other.

They were there again for results. And even if he heard worse, he would not lose hope anymore. At least he would strive for himself.

When that disease found him, he barely spoke a single word to his mother, and now they became like friends.

That disease had met a man the day he found him. He no longer thought he was having time without that man.

Ander believe with all his heart that good can come from every evil. And he didn't know when he had turned into such a hopeful man. Maybe, when he falls in love with him...

\---

"I have good news for you..."

Ander could not hear what the doctor said because of the cries of joy echoing in his ears this time. It was the first time the illness would gradually release his body. It was the first moment he could get rid of the disease. Afterwards, whatever happened, he would remind himself of the happiness he had at that moment.

###

The two started living together a few months later. As Omar said, that house now became Ander's house too.

He soon learned that he was bad at housework. Ander had shown this to him every day, but that would be one of the things they fixed on each other. And Omar would no longer have to get used to being alone.

\---

One day Ander put a red box on the table while eating the food of he made for them. He was eager to learn housework. But since he was still a learning phase, the food could be so weird that the human body could not stand it. Still, he had made it himself because he wanted the meals of that day to be special as well, but it was such a foolishness idea. Omar looked strangely at that box and got into a coughing attack while his lover's strange food caught in his throat.

As Ander hurried over to him, he would tell him to drink water and pat him slowly on the back.

When Omar recovered a little, he reached into the box. He first examined the outside, then opened it slowly inside. He saw two rings standing there. And he listened to Ander's speech.

"I thought ... I think it must be a symbol of what we promised each other." He pointed to the rings inside the box. "Like these."

Omar spoke, hoping that he laughed - that he didn't cry. His voice was quite strange.

"What if I won't accept…" he asked mischievously.

Ander answered with a laugh.

"Your face says has no possibility of not accepting it."

Omar wore one ring to Ander, Ander wore the other ring to Omar. He kissed his lover, whose curls slowly began to come back. He was trying to kiss all over his face as he hugged him.

"I love you." he said kindly. And he heard his return instantly.

"I love you, too." And he heard his return instantly.

Omar pulled towards his ear and continued to speak like a whisper.

"Stay with me... forever."

Ander chuckled. He could feel Omar's arms hovering over his body.

"I don't think there is such a time intervalon the calendar."

Omar drew back from ear line to see his face.

"We can add it."

Even if they could not add, Ander would believe that the time interval called eternity existed during his stay with him. Just like Omar did.

**Author's Note:**

> The End...
> 
> Thanks for reading!!
> 
> When I thought of an idea they met at the bar, I was just thinking of writing a one-shot chapter and quitting. But I wrote so far both thanks to your nice comments and because I think it will be incomplete with a one-shot chapter. 
> 
> English isn't my own language. I apologize for my mistakes.  
> If you comment to me about things you want to see, or problems with my writing style, I can improve myself :)


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